Speak Now
by pleasexstay
Summary: OneShot; inspired by Hayley Williams.
1. Reality

**This one-shot was inspired by the amazing Hayley Williams. Thanks go out to my friends, Maddy and Jack.**

Today was the day. I was going to tell him how I really felt. I was ready to fall into the unknown and maybe, just maybe, he would be there to catch me. Sighing to myself, I knew that wouldn't be a possibility, we had been friends for 10 years and only now was I telling him that I had feelings for him. I'm a coward. Running a hand through my smooth hair, I walked to my closet and starred at my clothes. My outfit today had to be perfect. I had to look different today, better different. Minutes later, I decided that it wasn't going to get any than this and pulled out a white singlet and a black high-waisted pencil skirt. I placed them on my bed and wandered into the bathroom. I slowly undressed, still partially asleep and stepped into the shower, twisting the cold and hot knobs until I got the water to the perfect temperature. I let the water drop onto my body, feeling the instant relief.

Fifteen minutes later, after I was fully prepared for the day in front of me, twisted the knobs off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around my physic. I walked towards the mirror in my bathroom, sighing at the girl who looked back at me. I didn't know who this was. It was just some girl who was too afraid to tell her best friend she was in love with him. "Pathetic," I muttered to myself. Running a brush through my wet hair, I couldn't help but stare at myself. I wondered who I had become. I thought about how I was before him. I was strong, confident and I wasn't afraid to go after what I wanted, but now, because of Jack, I was more scared than ever. He was the only one who knew me inside out. The only one who knew all of my deep and darkest secrets. The only one I truly loved. Sure, I "loved" those men at one point, but I wasn't in love with them. But with Jack, I was head over heels in love with him, he amazed me. Everything he did was monumental. He could smile and the whole room would light up. His happiness was a treasure to this world and I deeply hated everyone who caused him any harm. I was there for him through every break up of his and the only thing I could think of while I was comforting him was, "why can't you see me the way I see you?" Sighing at the thought, I put down the hair brush and picked up my curling iron. I remember every night I spent with him in detail. Every. Little. Thing. The way he smiled, the way he said my name, the way he held me. I quickly curled my hair and walked back into my bedroom, first putting on my underwear and strapless bra. _Strapless will be best_, I thought to myself as I looked at my chosen outfit. I finally got dressed and slipped on my favorite black heels. They were my good luck shoes, whenever I was in those shoes, something good would happen, this time, I was hoping that Jack would be the good thing. Smiling at that thought, I grabbed my black blazer and my purse and I was finally out the door.

When I arrived at work, everyone was there already. I slid into my office quietly hoping that no one would be able to notice that I wasn't there for the staff meeting. Hopefully someone covered for me. As soon I entered the room, the phone rang, jumping a little, I walked towards it as I placed my purse down onto my desk, "hello?" I answered.

"Hey, Nat." Jack replied, sounding excited. "I need to talk to you about something."

I smiled, "really?" I asked, his mood was already changing mine, "come up to the office."

"I'll be there in 10." He promised, smiling at his voice, I finally placed the phone back down. I slowly took my blazer off, still in a daze. He was coming. To tell me something. I had to remind myself to breathe, even though I felt selfish, I still wanted him. More than I've wanted anyone else.

Although he was in my office sooner than he had promised, the minutes felt like forever. It was like time had fully stopped and once again, I was unable to breathe.

As he entered my office, a huge smile appeared on my face, I automatically got up out of my seat and walked over to him and hugged him tightly. "It's good to see you." I murdered against his shoulder.

"It's good to see you too." He replied, leaning out of the embrace, "I have a surprise." He said, smiling like he has just discovered the cure of cancer.

I giggled softly, "what is it?" I asked as I felt my face slowly start to heat up.

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a small box, I automatically bring my hands up to my mouth. "Oh my gosh!" I scream.

He chuckles, "I know... Isn't it great?" He asked, slowly opening the box revealing a diamond ring, "I'm going to ask Rose to marry me!"

"E-E-E-E-Excuse me?" I finally spat out. My heart sunk. Wait, that's an understatement. It felt like he ripped out my heart from my chest and stomped all over it, regardless of how I felt or what I wanted to tell him.

His smile faded, "what's wrong? I thought you would be happy for me. You were ecstatic just a minute ago.." He asked, obviously confused.

"That's because I.." Trailing off, I realized that I couldn't admit what I really thought. "N-Nevermind." I finished.

"You what?" He asked, slightly irritated, "tell me, Natalie. What is it? I've known you for years and you've never kept a secret from me." He said, taking a step towards me. "Ever."

"N-No. This is the one thing I cannot tell you. It will ruin everything." I said, taking an irregularly large step backwards towards my desk where it was safe.

"Tell. Me." He insisted, stepping towards me again.

"I-I-I.." I started, _great start, Nat, now he thinks you're stupid and selfish_, taking another step backwards, I felt myself step into my desk, "ow," I murmured.

"What is it, Nat? Just spit it out. I'm meeting Rose soon." He said, suddenly uninterested in what I had to say.

I scoffed, "why does it matter anyway? You don't care. People say that nothing is impossible, but they're wrong, you wanna know why? Because it is impossible for you to love me!" I asked, now angry. I stood up straight and stepped towards him. I was no longer scared of this man. He would not control me anymore. I was sick of it.

"What?" He asked, "what are you trying to say?"

I took a deep breath, looking down as I shook my head. Looking back at him, "I'm in love with you, you fucking moron." I said simply, no love or hate. No emotion what so ever.

**Reviews? Should I continue? ;)**


	2. Forever

**I'm not even going to lie right now, when I see reviews, my face lights up. It's ridiculous. I'm not sure if this is the last part of Speak Now, but let me know if you want me to keep going and turn it into a series, cause then I'mma have to think about plots. **

**A thank-you goes out of my friend, Maddy. She has always been there for me and she's always encouraging to wrote more, so this is for her. :) **

"Y-Y-Y.." was all he managed to choke out.

Sighing to myself, I grabbed my purse from my desk and walked to the door, "call me when you're ready to talk." I said, still emotionless. Walking out of the door, I still saw the shadow of his still body. I rushed out of the building, I couldn't be there anymore. It was the place I had ruined my life. Jack didn't love me the way I loved him and I knew it. I was stupid to think that would change just because I told him I was in love him. He was going to propose to Rose, for God's sake. I was a stupid, stupid woman. I took a deep breath as a ran a hand through my hair, _I need to shop_, I thought to myself, smiling slightly at that thought, I spent the rest of the rest of the day shopping which would usually cure everything but today, it didn't. I walked around the stores with a frown on my face, with that said, I still brought some really cute outfits and shoes. I glanced at my phone for the hundredth time this afternoon, nothing. Not even a text message. I looked up at the ceiling of the store in attempt to stop my tears from welling up, strangely, it worked. Looking back at the racks of clothes, I decided that this isn't the place I wanted to be. I wanted to be at my apartment. The only place that I would wear sweats, eat ice-cream, watch romantic movies and cry until I couldn't cry anymore.

As I got into the taxi, I heard a very familiar song on the radio, Forever by Chris Brown. Sighing at this song, I asked the taxi driver if he could turn it down a little but he ignored me. Looking at the window, I started to think of why I actually hated the song, when it came out, I remember being so excited and then a couple of days later, I wasn't interested anymore. Not because I disliked Chris Brown, but for another reason that I just couldn't put my finger on it...

_*Suppressed memory (flashback)*_

"_Come dance with me!" I begged, giggling. _

"_No, I can't dance." The young Jack replied. Ignoring his reply, I grabbed his hand and lead him to the dance floor, the song had just changed. It was a Chris' Brown's song, Forever. Giggling as I twirled around him, we were both drunk but he seemed to be handling the alcohol better than I was. He gently grabbed me, holding me close to his chest, "sh..." was all that managed to leave his lips. I smiled as a buried my face in his chest, taking everything in for the first time. This was the closest I had ever been to Jack and if I had been sober, I would have ruined it by telling him about my true feelings. I slowly wrapped my hands around his waist and squeezed gently. This was beyond perfect and if I could remember anything from tonight, this was the part I wanted to remember. I could feel Jack's eyes on me, smiling at this idea, I looked up to see exactly what I had pictured in my mind. We must have looked like the two dorkiest people on earth but I honestly didn't care. Slowly, he leaned down and pecked my lips. I smiled against his lips and kissed him back. Leaning out of this kiss, I rested my head on his shoulder. "It's you and me forever, Nat. Always." He whispered. I didn't want this night to end. I finally got what I needed to be happy. Jack. _

_/Suppressed memory (flashback)_

As I finally arrived at my apartment, I unlocked the door and walked in, dropping my bags by the door. "Finally," I sighed to myself, closing and locking the door behind me as I walked into my bedroom, getting changed into my favorite pair of sweats. I grabbed a jacket and wore it over my singlet. "Better," I said to myself as I walked back into the living room and laid on my couch. I starred at my window for what had felt like forever. This is exactly what I needed. I need to be comfortable. In my own apartment. On my couch. And away from people who caused me pain. Jack used to cause me pleasure, not pain. And now, here I was, trying to fight back tears. It was funny how easily Jack could break me. He couple say a simple word like, "love" and my heart would crack because I knew that he could never feel that sort of emotion for me. Placing my hands on my face gently, I could feel the tears building in my eyes. Sliding up to the top of my head, I took a deep breath. _I am not crying over Jack, not again, not right now_, I thought to myself, "_never again_," softly shaking my head, shutting my eyes. I couldn't keep doing this to myself. I needed to let him go. He loves Rose and he is going to marry her. I can't change that.

Minutes later, I heard a knock on the door, getting up automatically, I unlocked the door and automatically. Jack. I took a deep breath, turning around with my back against the door. Dropping to my feet I sat at the door.

"Open the door.. please." He pleaded, "I need to talk to you."

I chuckled without humor, "I think you've said enough.." I replied, wiping away my tears.

Feeling his fist collide with the door, I cringed. "Let. Me. In." He said, trying to control his voice.

Standing up quickly, I opened the door and let him in, "what do you want?" I asked as I felt more tears developing.

"How dare you tell me that you have feelings for me!" He yelled, "I'm about to marry Rose! Not you, Rose. My girlfriend." He emphasised the word girlfriend, as if that didn't hurt without the emphasis.

"I know.. I-"

"No, it's my turn to talk. You don't get to talk." He said, cutting me off sternly. "Do you know what pisses me off the most, Nat? We could have been together years ago. I thought that kiss meant something to you!" He screamed, I have never seen him this angry.

"Wait... What the fuck are you talking about? We never kissed..." I said, trying to find a memory that showed Jack and I kissing but I couldn't find one. "I would have remembered." I added.

His face relaxed suddenly, "you really don't remember?" He asked me in a calm tone.

I shook my head, "sorry."

"That night.. We got drunk and went to a club... Chris Brown was playing.. Forever... I think." He started and suddenly, it all clicked.

"I-I-I..." was all I managed to say.

"I loved you, Natalie." He said softly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I whispered. "I loved you from the day I met you. Ever since you introduced yourself to me. I knew. I knew that you were the one for me." Shaking my head gently, I exhaled, "And yet, you were hell bent on dating these girls who's IQ points are the same number as their age!" I could feel the venom in my voice, although I wanted to take those words back, I knew they were true and so did he. "I hated every single one of those stupid girls and so what? Maybe I was jealous. But at least I cared for you more than all of them put together." I added, even though I knew I should have stopped, I couldn't. All of these emotions were coming to the surface and I needed to get them out. "You have no fucking idea what I have been though.. Every. Single Day. The first thing I think of in the morning is you and how you are." I feel my voice getting angrier and angrier. "All I do in the morning is wake up and put my make-up on pray that you notice me for everything that I am, or could be to you. But no, I'm the stupid bitch who is in love with her best friend who is about to propose to his girlfriend!" Finally finishing, I took a deep breath.

"Fuck you. If you think that, then you obviously don't know shit." He started.

**Uh-ohhhhhhh ;)**

***For the "suppressed memory," she doesn't remember it because her mind blocks it because it would have lead her to be hurt, or so she thought ;) **

**Reviews? 3 or more for the next one.**


	3. Exception

**Ahhhhh! Here it is, the last part. :) **

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I snapped back, "you think I don't know anything? I know so much more than you do. I know how shitty you have made me feel ever since you started dating those stupid girls. You're the one who doesn't know a-" before I could finish my sentence, I was interrupted by Jack's lips, leaning out of the kiss almost instantly, I slapped him.

For a moment that felt like it lasted forever, we just stared at each other. I watched everything on his face, there were so many emotions in his eyes, longing, confusion and most important of them all, love. He had always been the boy that I had loved, smiling at that thought, I jumped up, wrapping my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, returning the kiss he had just given me. He held me up, smiling at me with my favorite smile.

"You're the only girl I've ever truly loved." He said proudly, softly kissing the top of my nose. I giggled softly. "I love you, so much." He added.

I could feel my face burning up slightly as he spoke the words that I have been waiting to hear for years now, "and I love you." I said with a smile.

In the few moments that had passed,my smile slowly became a frown, "wait," I suddenly said, leaning away from him completely, "what about Rose?" I asked, afraid of the answer.

His expression changed too, it became more serious, "I didn't intend to marry her," he admitted, I felt like jaw drop, "we've dated for a long time, I just felt like it was the right thing to do." He frowned a little, "I never meant to hurt anyone." I said softly, "especially you."

I smiled a little, as I set myself down back onto the the floor, "it's fine." I replied, absent-mindedly as I fixed my shirt, as I walked over to my couch and sat down. I didn't know how I felt anymore, is this what I really wanted? Did I want him to dump Rose for me? I gently bit down on my lip, getting deeper into my thoughts. I saw him walk over in my peripheral vision, sighing to myself, I avoided his eyes.

"Nat.." he said softly, "look at me please," he said in the same, calm tone. I reluctantly obeyed, smiling a little as I looked at him, everything changed when I looked at him, everything became more simple and nothing was complicated anymore. "you're the only one that I want, and that's never going to change. This isn't the best of situations, I admit it, but all you need to know is that I love you and I'm never going not to stop." He said with a huge smile, as he gently lifted up my chin, "smile, beautiful."

And just like that, I was putty in his hands, a smile appeared once again on my face, he leaned in and kissed me softly and smiled, "you're mine now, Natalie Williams." He whispered against my lips softly.

**Teehee, and that's the end of this one shot.**

**I'm sorry it's really short but I hope you guys enjoyed it and thank-you for reading it and liking it.**

**And giving me awesome reviews.  
**

**I hope all of you are well. **

**:)**


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